The One Thing You Can Do to Crush Imposter Syndrome

I was recently asked by an MBA student how to combat imposter syndrome. It’s a common question these days as we all, men and women alike, start talking about our vulnerabilities, which is an incredibly healthy exercise. But imposter syndrome tends to hit women especially hard because we have been working in a culture that was designed by and for men. Thankfully, this is slowly shifting, but it is apparent based on how much we read about imposter syndrome that nothing is changing fast enough. In fact, there is an entire industry now created to address imposter syndrome and the confidence gap that women in business tend to have. But there is one simple thing that every woman can do in an hour to crush their imposter syndrome: take account of the micro and macro aggressions that you have endured through your career.

I went through this exercise before I started CEOX because I wanted to understand why I was having so much anxiety around my work. I took the time to write out those experiences that formed me, especially as a young woman fresh out of college working in a male-dominated industry. As I started to write these experiences down, more situations kept popping into my head that I had forgotten about. I realized that as many women do, I had done my best to ignore and power through these experiences. Nothing was going to stop me! 

It was shocking to see how many of these events I had survived as a 40-something businesswoman. Seeing them written down made me realize how damaging and undermining they were. Events like:

• Walking into my first business meeting, being introduced to a room full of men in suits and having one of the men say in full voice to the others, “Wow, she has great legs.”

• Being told to type up a report by a man because he didn’t type.

• Asking for a raise and being told no because my boyfriend (who I lived with) was making plenty of money. (I know you think that stuff stopped happening in the 50s, but I can tell you it was alive and well in the 2000s.)

• Being asked to fill in for the receptionist. I was an engineer. 

• Numerous other examples of being made to feel stupid for not being able to mathematically solve some engineering issue when it turned out, the lead engineers couldn’t do it either.

This accounting of events in your life is in no way to be a victim, but a way to undercut the damage that has occurred from a lifetime of work that was not appreciated. It’s a way to overcome, reclaim our confidence, and prepare ourselves for success. It may seem counterproductive to dwell on the past but in this case, it gave me a clear picture of the misogyny I faced and the obstacles I had to overcome in order to be successful. Only after really sitting down and writing down these experiences could I see how damaging they were. At the time I was not willing to even acknowledge the pain they caused because acknowledging them would have been even worse. Reflecting on my past and realizing all I could accomplish was incredibly empowering.

If this exercise doesn’t work its magic, remember that people who don’t question their own competence are missing out on introspection and growth. So go ahead and feel a little imposter syndrome from time to time, but understand where it comes from and let it drive you into more fulfilling and impactful work.